This is a true story from the WordPerfect help line.
Needless to say, the
help desk employee was fired; however, that person
is currently suing the
WordPerfect organization for "termination without
cause".


The following is a taped conversation leading
up to dismissal:
"WordPerfect Technical Desk, May I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with
WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along and all of a
sudden the words went
away."

"Went Away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing"

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I
type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get
out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on
the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't
accept anything I
type!"

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that
looks like a TV. Does it
have a

little light that tells you when its on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and
find where the power
cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell
me if it's plugged into
the wall."

"Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you
notice that there were two
cables plugged into the back of it, not just
one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back
there again and find the
other
cable."

"Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me , and tell me if it's plugged
securely into the back
of
your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Un-huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something
and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right
angle - it's because it's
dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes, - the office light is off, and the only
light I have is coming
in
from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't"

"No, why not?"

Because there's a power outage."

"A power .........A power outage? Aha, Okay,
we've got it licked now.
Do
you still have the boxes and manuals and
packing stuff your computer
came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good, Go get them, and unplug your system and
pack it up just like
it
was

when you got it. Then take it back to the
store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I
tell them?"

"Tell them you're too f#$%ing STUPID TO OWN
A COMPUTER."